session Seven
Assertiveness
Learning to be assertive helps us to deal with situations that are causing us problems in a calm way so that we can resolve difficulties and achieve positive outcomes - both for ourselves and for any other people involved.
In the PowerPoint below we first look at how we can recognise three different kinds of behaviour: Aggressive, Passive and Assertive and the consequences of these behaviours.
Then we explain the DEAL method with a couple of examples you can use for practice.
If you decide to try using the DEAL method to resolve one of your own problems, it is a good idea to work out what you want to say before you talk to the other person concerned.
In the PowerPoint below we first look at how we can recognise three different kinds of behaviour: Aggressive, Passive and Assertive and the consequences of these behaviours.
Then we explain the DEAL method with a couple of examples you can use for practice.
If you decide to try using the DEAL method to resolve one of your own problems, it is a good idea to work out what you want to say before you talk to the other person concerned.
Procrastination
Procrastination is putting things off. We probably all do it at some time or other. Often a person can be very efficient and organised in some parts of their lives but have other areas they will just put off dealing with something as much as they can.
An example of procrastination might be not dealing with your post but just putting it in the drawer until later. Sometimes people start doing this because they have money worries and can't face opening any letters in case there is more bad news.
How can we overcome procrastination?
Put simply:
1: We break things down into small, manageable steps and if necessary get someone to helps us.
2: We reward ourselves for each small step we achieve - even if it's something small like a cup of tea, a walk in the sunshine or half an hour watching something on TV
For the letter example, the small steps might go something like...
Get the letters out of the drawer, open them, sort them into junk mail (recycle), things that are just for information but need keeping (put them somewhere safe) and things that need dealing with. Then sort the things that need dealing with by how urgent they are and whether you can deal with them yourself or need help.
If you are really anxious, you might need someone to help you with the very first stage of getting the letters out and opening them - if this is you, you are not alone feeling like this!
Some people think of this as "Eating the Elephant" - one small bit at a time.
An example of procrastination might be not dealing with your post but just putting it in the drawer until later. Sometimes people start doing this because they have money worries and can't face opening any letters in case there is more bad news.
How can we overcome procrastination?
Put simply:
1: We break things down into small, manageable steps and if necessary get someone to helps us.
2: We reward ourselves for each small step we achieve - even if it's something small like a cup of tea, a walk in the sunshine or half an hour watching something on TV
For the letter example, the small steps might go something like...
Get the letters out of the drawer, open them, sort them into junk mail (recycle), things that are just for information but need keeping (put them somewhere safe) and things that need dealing with. Then sort the things that need dealing with by how urgent they are and whether you can deal with them yourself or need help.
If you are really anxious, you might need someone to help you with the very first stage of getting the letters out and opening them - if this is you, you are not alone feeling like this!
Some people think of this as "Eating the Elephant" - one small bit at a time.
review
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